She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
