I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
how does that bad decision feel?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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