I got chris browned last night
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
