also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize