Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
