I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
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