That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
So many bounce houses so little time
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
