You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize