I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
