I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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