sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
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