Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
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