Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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