Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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