her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
