would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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