Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Randomize
