is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
i now understand why vodka
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
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