i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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