I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize