I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
