Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
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