We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
