Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize