btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize