Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
