He asked to "fluff my boner.."
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
