In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Randomize
