I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
