THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
And the cops told us we were all naked.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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