the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
