my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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