Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
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