You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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