No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
There's even glitter on my cock...
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