He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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