love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
