The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Randomize
