That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
