your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize