my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize