Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
