wakey wakey hands off snakey
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
