You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
