Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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