why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
