I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
