You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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