come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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