You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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